irony

twenty-four hours in a day...
and struggling to find a minute

late night

late night
bike rides
social times
abandoned lots
swimming pools
new friends
old renewed
smiles around

new creation

pride is something that holds on to me (or i have held onto for a long time now) but galatians 5:25-26 says in the message translation, "Since this is the kind of life we have chosen, the life of the Spirit, let us make sure that we do not just hold it as an idea in our heads or a sentiment in our hearts, but work out its implications in every detail of our lives. That means we will not compare ourselves with each other as if one of us were better and another worse. We have far more interesting things to do with our lives. Each of us is an original." recognizing that my life is not my own but is only God's to use for His glory has been huge.

i was a model and actor in my mid to late teen years and as a result i grew in my ability to make myself look better and feel better than everyone else. if there was a way to view myself as better than someone, i did. i was in the top of my class in modeling and was on my way to a career full of selfish, arrogant, conceded thoughts and actions. by the grace of God He had/has captured my heart and over the past couple of years has taught me that i am nothing, my accomplishments mean nothing, my achievements while at the time were huge still mean nothing and have no eternal effect, but God is the one who has granted these things to me and on my own will i would have never accomplished anything but hate, lust, sin, and death. growing up God has allowed things in my life to happen in order to mold me and make me into His creation, He has used the skills and strengths that i have developed growing up to make me into the man i am becoming. patient, loving, humble, a servant, and a hard worker. though these areas are minuscule in comparison to Christ's example, He is working in my heart and is calling me to listen to what He has to say.

a life with Christ is what i desire. He remains faithful even when i am not. my life is nothing apart from Christ, my accomplishments mean nothing apart from Christ, apart from Christ i am nothing, in Christ i am a new creation, something eternal.

as tall as lions

love love love (love love)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2nrEAqLVEOM&feature=related

rays

the sun is out again

the blood under my skin begins to boil

it is a warmth that has been missed

i have welcome the sun

like a prodigal child returning home

riding my bike with friends

arms open wide as if to taunt the sun

screaming at the top of my lungs

is that all you got?

eyes shut, arms wide, wind in my hair, and a smile on my face

it's summer time at last

the sun, a source of joy

the Son, my source of joy

the sun, a source of warmth

the Son, my source of warmth

the sun, shines on me

the Son, shines in me

treasure

the older i get, the brevity of flesh becomes more apparent. at 20 i'm realizing that my life in the flesh is an on going battle. if i was able to control my pride, lust, anger, and selfishness i wouldn't need God, but in surrendering my life to God, He has helped me with all of the things i struggle with. God allows me to struggle in my flesh because by denying my flesh i am giving God control and allowing Him to receive the glory due to Him. without Christ in my life and in my heart... i am a worm, He has set up in my heart and i have handed over the reigns and given Him control to rebuke, convict, and correct me in my flesh. so it is no longer of importance to me. i want to burn out for God. i want to make disciples the rest of my life, and i know God will use my time on this earth for His kingdom's work. my relationship with God has become a treasure to me.

Your word it sustains me

i've come to this place

with intentions of finding You

Your truth is a lamp

Your wisdom my light

i'm seeking Your face

with intentions of finding You

i would run for a thousand years

if i knew every step would be getting me closer

i'd swim to the ocean floor

for my Lord is the treasure

my Lord is the treasure

Holy holy

Holy is the Lord